Should You Consider a Sleep Divorce?

You might be surprised to learn that sleeping apart from your partner – often called a “sleep divorce” – isn’t a sign of a failing relationship. In fact, it’s a growing trend among couples seeking better sleep and stronger bonds. Studies reveal that nearly one-third of adults have chosen to sleep separately, and many report improved sleep quality and enhanced relationship satisfaction as a result.

Far from being a dramatic split, a sleep divorce is about creating a rest environment that works for both partners. Whether it’s sleeping in separate rooms or just different beds, the goal is to reduce disturbances like snoring, differing schedules, or temperature preferences so both partners can get the rest they need.

So, if you’re tossing and turning over your partner’s sleep habits, a sleep divorce might just be the solution you need. Let’s explore how this unconventional approach can lead to better nights and brighter days.

A sleep divorce can offer a range of benefits for couples, including better sleep, improved health, less conflict, and stronger intimacy.

A sleep divorce often means fewer disturbances from restlessness, mismatched sleep patterns, or snoring. In fact, our Sleep Survey found that 24% of people sleep better without their partner, with snoring being the top cause of nighttime wake-ups.

Sleeping solo also gives you complete control over your sleep environment – from choosing the right mattress firmness and duvet thickness to setting the room temperature or even playing white noise that your partner might not enjoy. And of course, there’s no need to compromise on space in the bed or fight over the duvet!

These everyday annoyances aren’t the only issue. Research shows that while many couples say they prefer sharing a bed, brainwave monitoring has found co-sleeping can actually reduce sleep quality, leading to lighter, more fragmented rest. Sleeping separately, however, may support deeper, more restorative sleep, particularly if your partner has a sleep disorder such as insomnia or sleep apnoea, where frequent waking or breathing interruptions can disturb both people.

Getting better quality sleep supports everything from your mood and your skin to your heart and immune system health. Sleeping separately isn’t just about peace and quiet – it’s about giving your body the uninterrupted rest it needs to thrive. Research consistently shows that setting up your ideal sleep environment alone can translate into much deeper, more restorative slumber.

A report from the Sleep Foundation found that around 53% of couples who tried a sleep divorce experienced improved sleep quality and got, on average, 37 more minutes of sleep per night. That extra rest isn’t just about feeling less tired – sleep supports mood regulation, immune function, and cardiovascular health, while also aiding mental sharpness and emotional resilience.

Few things breed resentment in a relationship faster than a partner who keeps you awake and deprives you of much-needed rest. When both partners are running on too little sleep, they may be grumpier and less patient with each other. Sleep deprivation can also make you more irritable and strain how happy you feel in your relationship. A sleep divorce – giving each other space to get a good night’s rest – can help you wake up refreshed, more patient, and better able to enjoy time together.

Counterintuitive as it sounds, sleep divorces can actually improve your relationship intimacy. You’ll have more energy, less stress, and better moods by prioritising rest. You also support overall health and boost libido, making separate sleeping arrangements the secret ingredient to a happier, healthier relationship.

Pharmica’s superintendent pharmacist, Carolina Goncalves, agrees. In an interview with The Independent, she explained:

“Sleeping in separate beds can give couples the chance to truly appreciate the intimacy of being together. Physical distance may actually increase longing and desire, contributing to a more passionate and fulfilling relationship. It can also make the time spent together feel more meaningful, helping to foster deeper emotional connections and improve overall relationship satisfaction.”

So, is it time for a sleep divorce? Here are a few signs that sleeping apart might be the key to better sleep and a stronger relationship:

• Restlessness: If you can’t get comfortable or are constantly tossing and turning, you may prefer sleeping in different beds.
• Regular disturbances: Snoring, bathroom trips, and duvet battles can all keep you awake.
• Different sleep schedules: If one of you is a night owl and the other is an early bird, this can disrupt your circadian rhythm, leading to fatigue and frustration.
• Irritability: If you’re feeling snappy from a lack of rest, a sleep divorce can improve your mood and cause you to argue less.
• Health issues: Lack of sleep can impact your health by preventing the crucial repair of cells and tissues while you rest. This can weaken your immune system, lead to digestive issues, and increase your risk of illnesses.
• Relationship issues: If there’s growing tension or reduced intimacy, it could be due to a lack of sleep. Maybe a night apart can help you heal together.
• Dreading bedtime: If going to bed with your partner fills you with dread, it may be time to consider a sleep divorce.
• Wanting your own space: If you’ve been craving your space to stretch out and relax, or getting frustrated when cuddling at night, sleeping separately might be the right choice.

A sleep divorce isn’t a sign of relationship trouble; it’s a practical step to protect your health and happiness. By prioritising sleep, you’re actually investing in your partnership. Rested couples are happier couples, with more energy, less conflict, and better intimacy. Combine your sleep divorce with our other proven ways to sleep better at night to enjoy your most restful night yet.