Sleep Like Log from A to Z
6 min read
Last Modified 15 September 2023 First Added 12 October 2021
Make the enemy of sleep an ally. Try setting a second alarm that reminds you when bedtime is. You never know, it might go off just as the ‘play next episode’ countdown starts. WILLPOWER!
If you’re not careful, the blue light from your phone screen can keep you up even longer. It tells your body that it’s daytime and you should still be outside photosynthesising or whatever it is you do.
One of the best ways to ensure timber-like slumber is to get up and go to bed at the same time every day. Even on weekends. Those long Sunday morning lie-ins literally give me Monday jet-lag.
Getting up and moving about is a great way to tell your body it’s daytime. And the more it knows when daytime is, the more it knows when nighttime is. I like to ask someone to roll me down a hill – that really gets me firing.
Not the chocolate kind, sadly. Kiwis and almonds are among nine superfoods (and drinks) for sleep. The others include fish, turkey, rice and walnuts. All washed down with chamomile tea and cherry juice. A* for you if you can combine all of those into an edible meal.
I am grateful that I am a log.
I am grateful for my beautiful bark.
I am grateful I don’t have leaf-blight.
Writing down just three things you’re grateful for before bed is an amazing way to quieten the mind, forget the stresses of the day and drift off into a relaxing sleep.
Whether it’s through your mouth or your elegant network of roots, staying well hydrated can help you sleep. (Keeping everything nice and moist can also reduce snoring, so your partner can sleep too).
Laughter releases happy and relaxing hormones that also help us sleep well. I would tell you a joke to help you right now, but I fear my delivery is too wooden.
L-theanine is an amino acid. Researchers in one study found that around 400mg of L-theanine greatly improved sleep in animals and humans. So the results from the studies on logs must not be in yet. Watch this space.
Some intrepid sleep-o-nauts have been using specially designed tape that keeps the mouth shut during sleep. Perfect to keep you breathing through your nose (and to stop you snoring).
To sleep like Log, one must first zen like Log. Meditating is one of the most powerful tools we have to help us sleep, and improve our mood during the day. Simply close your eyes and follow your breath. As little as 5 minutes can help.
We all know how much sleep we need to get (7–9 hours), but not all sleep is log-level sleep. So even if you’re getting enough, try adding in a few of these tips to get deeper, dreamier, more restful sleep.
Nature’s alarm clock, and its lullaby. There is no better way to wake up than being outside as the sun comes up, and going for a walk as the sun sets. They’re the two most important times of day for our circadian rhythm.
(And they’re GREAT for your Instagram game.)
Science says there are four chronotypes: Bears, Wolves, Lions and Dolphins. You can find out which type you are with a simple internet quiz. Your type determines when you sleep best and when you’re most productive. About 50% of us are Bear type, 20% are Wolf, 20% Lion, 10% Dolphin and 0.0001% Log.
Even a tidy room needs a good vacuuming once in a while. A microscopically clean bedroom can help avoid sleep-disturbing irritations from dust to the dreaded bed bugs (or termites, in my case).
Red tinted glasses aren’t just a fashion statement. They block out the blue light from screens and ceiling lights, so if you’re tapping away late at night, don a pair of funky red frames so you don’t miss out on sleep once you’re finished.
The Chinese tradition of Feng Shui says you should place your bed in the ‘commanding position’ which means in sight of the door, but not directly in front of it. To be fair, I do like commanding from bed; ‘no, you close the blinds’ and ‘you turn the downstairs light off’ are a few of my favourites.
Follow the sage advice of Log, and Zzzs will be your reward. Many of them.