Sleep Like Log from A to Z

6 min read

Last Modified 15 September 2023 First Added 12 October 2021

A is for actually going to bed

Make the enemy of sleep an ally. Try setting a second alarm that reminds you when bedtime is. You never know, it might go off just as the ‘play next episode’ countdown starts. WILLPOWER!

B is for banish phones from the bedroom

If you’re not careful, the blue light from your phone screen can keep you up even longer. It tells your body that it’s daytime and you should still be outside photosynthesising or whatever it is you do.

C is for consistency

One of the best ways to ensure timber-like slumber is to get up and go to bed at the same time every day. Even on weekends. Those long Sunday morning lie-ins literally give me Monday jet-lag.

D is for dreams – no, not that Dreams

Dreams are actually really important for our brains. The dreamier our sleep the more creative (and log-ical) we are the next day.

E is for exercise

Getting up and moving about is a great way to tell your body it’s daytime. And the more it knows when daytime is, the more it knows when nighttime is. I like to ask someone to roll me down a hill – that really gets me firing.

F is for fruit (and nut)

Not the chocolate kind, sadly. Kiwis and almonds are among nine superfoods (and drinks) for sleep. The others include fish, turkey, rice and walnuts. All washed down with chamomile tea and cherry juice. A* for you if you can combine all of those into an edible meal.

G is for gratitude

I am grateful that I am a log.

I am grateful for my beautiful bark.

I am grateful I don’t have leaf-blight.

Writing down just three things you’re grateful for before bed is an amazing way to quieten the mind, forget the stresses of the day and drift off into a relaxing sleep.

H is for hydration

Whether it’s through your mouth or your elegant network of roots, staying well hydrated can help you sleep. (Keeping everything nice and moist can also reduce snoring, so your partner can sleep too).

I is for inhalation

It might not sound like a big deal, but nose breathing at night is incredibly important. It helps our body slip into rest mode. (See ‘M’ for a nifty hack).

J is for jokes

Laughter releases happy and relaxing hormones that also help us sleep well. I would tell you a joke to help you right now, but I fear my delivery is too wooden.

K is for kold. C was taken.

Your body temperature needs to drop a few degrees to fall asleep, a cool room helps. So can a hot shower, weirdly, as the blood leaves our core and cools our skin.

L is for L-theanine

L-theanine is an amino acid. Researchers in one study found that around 400mg of L-theanine greatly improved sleep in animals and humans. So the results from the studies on logs must not be in yet. Watch this space.

M is for mouth-taping

Some intrepid sleep-o-nauts have been using specially designed tape that keeps the mouth shut during sleep. Perfect to keep you breathing through your nose (and to stop you snoring).

N is for naturism

It says here that sleeping nude is good for sleep, as it helps lower your core body temperature. Being a log, it’s safe to say naturism comes easily to me.

O is for ohm

To sleep like Log, one must first zen like Log. Meditating is one of the most powerful tools we have to help us sleep, and improve our mood during the day. Simply close your eyes and follow your breath. As little as 5 minutes can help.

P is for plants

Toxin-tackling houseplants can help us breathe better and sleep deeper. And, if you have a 90ft ceiling, why not try a fully grown Oak?

Q is for quality

We all know how much sleep we need to get (7–9 hours), but not all sleep is log-level sleep. So even if you’re getting enough, try adding in a few of these tips to get deeper, dreamier, more restful sleep.

R is for reading

Nothing beats turning a couple of pages before bed. Although I tried reading Shackleton’s Log Book the other day, nothing about trees. 0/10.

S is for sunrise and sunset

Nature’s alarm clock, and its lullaby. There is no better way to wake up than being outside as the sun comes up, and going for a walk as the sun sets. They’re the two most important times of day for our circadian rhythm.

(And they’re GREAT for your Instagram game.)

T is for test

Science says there are four chronotypes: Bears, Wolves, Lions and Dolphins. You can find out which type you are with a simple internet quiz. Your type determines when you sleep best and when you’re most productive. About 50% of us are Bear type, 20% are Wolf, 20% Lion, 10% Dolphin and 0.0001% Log.

U is for unwind

When our mind is racing, sleep can be a struggle. Try a long bath with scents like lavender, peppermint, sandalwood, pine, or other essential oils of log.

V is for vacuuming

Even a tidy room needs a good vacuuming once in a while. A microscopically clean bedroom can help avoid sleep-disturbing irritations from dust to the dreaded bed bugs (or termites, in my case).

W is for wavey specs

Red tinted glasses aren’t just a fashion statement. They block out the blue light from screens and ceiling lights, so if you’re tapping away late at night, don a pair of funky red frames so you don’t miss out on sleep once you’re finished.

X marks the spot

The Chinese tradition of Feng Shui says you should place your bed in the ‘commanding position’ which means in sight of the door, but not directly in front of it. To be fair, I do like commanding from bed; ‘no, you close the blinds’ and ‘you turn the downstairs light off’ are a few of my favourites.

Y is for yoga

Yoga’s more gentle poses are great just before bed to calm the mind and relax the body. For starters try Cat Pose, Extended Child’s Pose, Head to Knee Pose and Downward Log.

Z is for Zzz

Follow the sage advice of Log, and Zzzs will be your reward. Many of them.

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